WORKOUT - (41)  4.0 miles/38 mins

Last short, slow, easy, music-less run before the full mary!

Look who just woke up and found her race registration papers.  And might want to think about finding a hairbrush….

Since we’re leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when I’ll be back again.  Actually, I do.  Tuesday, duh.  Here’s my little suitcase of goodness:

You want to be comfortable on a plane.  and fully clothed.  Nothing is grosser than sitting next to a sweaty, hairy man in a tank top for 5 hours. In a conceiled tube with NO FRESH AIR. 

Then I remember, Oh that’s my husband I’m talking about. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Airport style can be tricky.  Your main goal in flying and dressing should be to NOT GET ON THE TSA TERRORIST LIST.  What you wear can definitely tip off the TSA to your true intentions.  I should know; I used to work as one.*

Jessica Simpson.  I want those boots.  now.  She looks All-American.  Couldn’t be a terrorist.  Go through to your gate, miss.

Although she could be up to her elbows in adult powdered sugar and I don’t mean from baking holiday cookies, Kate Moss looks fab.  Fabulous people don’t blow up planes.  Go right ahead, ma’am.

The key here is effortless.  If you’re flying commercial, which is NO longer glamorous like it once was; try having a full body, cavity search, don’t dress like you’re going on a private jet.  It’s confusing.  And TSA will probably think you’re a terrorist.

Victoria Beckham is definitely hiding something under that tent.  Security, we need a pat down over here!!

Another don’t:

The homeless, (billionaire) bag lady look is also confusing.  Your coat is worth more than my car but you look like you climbed out of the gutter?!  Must be a terrorist!  Security!

For a normal person, this look could be acceptable and safe.  But we’re talking about Rihanna, whose outfits generally consist of bondage tape and Swarovski crystals. 

She’s definitely up to no good and hiding something.  We haven’t seen her this fully clothed since her last rendezvous with Chris Brown.  Security!

Halle Berry looks adorable.  And she makes cute kids with that model boyfriend of hers.  Plus, they did the whole “matching family outfits” thing.  Terrorists never match with their families.  They just don’t.  Everyone knows that.  They’re legit.  Have a nice flight, ma’am.

Although her acting and book writing skills could be labeled “criminal”, Lauren Conrad is looking like she owns the skies here.  Pure fab.  I will let her pass through security if she gives me those boots.  Otherwise, cavity search….

See ya in Vegas, lovers!

*Actually that is a lie.  I never worked for the TSA.  Or anyone, for that matter.  Jobs are overrated.

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