November 9, 2009

Sunday in Santa Barbara pictures

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(warning: this post contains lots of pictures of moi.  So if you’re not my mom or me, you might get super sick of this super fast.)

WORKOUT (yesterdays) - (34) Ran at the beach in Santa Barbara 10.15 miles/1 hr 26 mins

I’ve been taking a lot of days off from running to let my thutt heal but since I was in SB, I had to go run along the beach again.  It’s one of my all-time favorite places to run.

Before I went running, I took Marni for a walk.  We went to the Coffee Bean (they have amazing flavored coffee in the mornings until 11am) where she had to wait outside.  Doesn’t she look pitiful?  and creepy-eyed as well…

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Then we started on our 2.6 mile jaunt but I couldn’t go very far without taking pictures of myself.  You’re so vain you think this song post is about you…

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We walked by the Four Seasons Biltmore hotel which is uber expensive and gorgeous.  When I’m at a Motel 6 getting bed bugs I pretend I’m at the Biltmore.  And when I’m getting bed bugs in my own bed I like to pretend I’m at a Motel 6.

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It looks out on the ocean:

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In college everyone would go to the “Biltmore wall” and have relationship talks or as we called them, DTR’s.  Define The Relationship.  Do you want to go steady and be my boyfriend??  Looking back, this could possibly be the lamest thing of my entire college experience.

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Man, I’m such an awesome photographer.

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I still need to work and refine mine, but this is the “Lauren Conrad pose”:

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(from here)

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I took the dog back to the hotel, changed into my new race shirt and went running… at the beach.

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After running, I got ready to do a little shopping and football watching at a local sports bar.

But first, me and Jabe went to the beach.  So let’s recap:  Saturday I ran a half marathon at the beach.  Sunday morning I walked the dog at the beach, then went running at the beach, and then as if I don’t live 10 mins away from Laguna Beach year round, hubby and I went to the beach. 

I had to show him all the houses we’ll never be able to afford.  Nothing like lusting over an inanimate object, right?

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Representing Michael Crabtree from Texas Tech now with the San Francisco 49′ers.

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And I’m representing H&M.  Someone obviously doesn’t possess my same photography skills…

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We both decided that we love this house so much that we’re pursuing our employments options as a housekeeper and gardener just so we can hang out there:

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So…. who wants to see another pic of me?!?!?

While I go practice my self-portraits and posing, check out this blog:

Live,Love,Run,Pray

She’s training for her 1st half marathon and having a GIVEAWAY!

 

November 9, 2009

SB Newspress Half Marathon Race Recap

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I PR’ed: 1:41:05. 11th in my age group of 311, 195th overall.

I had all my stuff layed out the night before as usual.  But I couldn’t pick up my packet until race morning because we got into town too late.  I hate to do this because I’m anal retentive I want everything ready to go on race morning so I can focus on where the porta potties are and make my 14 peepee trips.

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Saturday morning I got up at 6, race started at 8.  I made sure to eat my Clif bar 75 mins before the race so everything would be in my stomache and not my throat.

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Our hote was .75 mile away from the start which was super convenient.  I took this picture as I was going to get my packet.

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I got my packet and am ready except that I don’t have any coffee running through my veins because our room didn’t have a coffee maker.  So I went to a nearby 7-11 and grabbed a big cup.  This is SO out of my normal race routine but I tried to just go with the flow because what else was I gonna do?  Run without coffee?  yeah right.

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I had never worn this shirt before; Jaybeezy bought it for me a long time ago for about $4 at Ross.  Problem was that it rode up like a Britney Spears baby tee.  If my stomache was made of anything besides donuts and candy I wouldn’t have a problem with this.  So I was adjusting myself the entire race,  like a guy with bad jock itch.

So the race starts; I’m in a good starting position and all is well.  This course has slight rolling hills so I thought there’s no way I can PR on a course that’s not completely flat so I’m just gonna run hard and enjoy the scenery.  (By scenery I mean Andrew Firestone) 

I barely look at my garmin the entire race.  Normally I’m obsessively checking it like it’s TMZ.  I just run at a pace that feels like I’m pushing it but sustainable.  I take a GU at 7 and one at mile 10.  I don’t think the second GU was necessary, but you can’t argue with a PR can ya?

The first 5 are rolling hills then it flattens out for about 3 miles, couple more small hills and then flat again.  We ran by Ty Warner’s megamansion.  He started Beanie Babies and now collects expensive real estate like I collect Starbucks mugs.

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Who would ever think you could become a billionaire from making something as dumb and ugly as that clown in the yellow outfit?  Good ‘ol capitalism…  If anyone’s WAY behind the cool curve and wants to buy a couple Beanie Babies, like 200, call me.  I’ve got them. unfortunately.

So I just keep running hard and thinking of a way I can make a billion dollars.  I don’t come up with any feasible idea, but I do cross the finish line at 1:41:05.  I beat my old PR by over a minute and am pretty much shocked.  My average pace was 7:43/mile. 

I think it really helped that I wasn’t looking at my garmin and mentally psyching myself out…. Can I sustain this pace??  Oh man, it’s only been .25 mile since last time I checked, I have so far to go.  I’m going too fast, I’m gonna die…

And best of all, my thutt didn’t hurt at all during the race.  PRAISE THE LORD from the rafters!  It was sore afterwards but no pain.  I warmed up with a mile jog and cooled down with a 75. mile walk, but I didn’t do any extra miles after the race.  I don’t think this whole “running more miles after a race” thing is ever going to happen…

And best BEST of all, I beat Andrew Firestone!

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(from here)

Firestone, of The Bachelor, Firestone Vineyards, Firestone Tires, finished in 1:52:58.  Unfortunately I didn’t even get to see him.  Had I known he was running, I’m positive I would have slowed down just to catch a glimpse.  Yes, I’m a pathetic pseudo-celebrity stalker.  But one with a new PR!  Booyah!

 

November 7, 2009

Do/Don’t

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(Race recap coming Monday)

DO…

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feed your kids in 5 inch YSL heels.  What?  They learn quick; you want your kid to grow up and be a schlep?

DON’T…

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go bra-less after having two kids and before having a boob lift.

DO…

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pay your taxes… even if you make a buttload of money.  The IRS won’t forget… especially if you make a buttload of money.  (Nick owes a couple bucks)

DON’T…

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have Michael Lohan (or Jon for that matter) for a dad if you can help it.  Or you might get kidnapped.

DON’T…

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under any circumstances dress like Lady Gaga.  Nope, not even Halloween.

DO…

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go running.  Extra points if you drag your spouse/boyfriend/fiance/soon to be ex after this run/friend with you.

 

November 6, 2009

And the winner is…

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[10] Comments 

WORKOUT – bike at gym/60 mins

While I appreciate some people’s enthusiasm, the rules were that it had to be a haiku answering the question, Why do you run?  From my limited knowledge of poetry (by poetry, I mean Bergdorf Blondes and The Devil Wears Prada) a haiku has to be 6 and only 6 words.  So that eliminates quite a few peeps, but again, thanks.  If I ever have to write a term paper, I’ll be calling you.

This was the hardest decision of my life; I love you all; we’ll be best friends forever; <<insert whatever crap I’m supposed to say>> let’s just get to it, shall we?

The runner up winning the FUNNIEST award is:

glamorousnewlywed  - “There’s a shoe sale at Neiman’s”

The runner up winning the most PERSISTENT award is:

livingandlovinginla  -  she commented about 44 times and wrote half a War and Peace.

The runner up winning the MOST VAIN award is:

Beth - “To keep my butt from spreading”

(Here’s to hoping Beth’s butt cheeks are in the same zip code)

And now…. The overall most awesomest award and winner of the 12 pack of Starbucks VIA instant coffee is:

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Karleen  – “Clear head, toned booty, french fries”

I kept reading all the entries over and over because honestly, any reason for running is a good one (and I’m a bit slow).  But Karleen’s touched alot of the reason we all run:

1. to relieve stress/for peace/to not go crazy in the head Nadya Suleman-style.  (Why do I keep talking about her?!)

2. to look good without clothes on… and prevent butt spread

3. and to get to eat more, especially things like trans-fat fries! yum.

Runners up will get a 3 pack of VIA and the grand salame gets the 12 pack.  Winners and weiners please email me your addresses or where ever you have your unmarked boxes shipped to.  I promise I won’t even sprinkle the package with anthrax.  Such a giver, I know. 

 

 

November 6, 2009

Somewhere in California

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Now is your absolute last chance to enter THE CONTEST.  Next post I’m picking a weiner, I mean winner.

Today we’re meeting a friend for dinner somewhere in California, an hour away in Fontana, and then driving somewhere in California, up to Santa Barbara.  Tomorrow morning I’m running the Santa Barbara Newspress Half Marathon.  If I feel good after the race, I’m going to try to run a couple more miles to get some marathon training in.

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We’re staying near the race start and right by the water.  We’re so close to the ocean we’ll probably have to seal our hotel door and wear rain boots.

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The Hotel Oceana.

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Saturday afternoon I’m going to a friends’ baby shower somewhere in California, an hour and a half north of Santa Barbara in Pismo Beach. 

Then we’ll spend the rest of weekend back in SB… me acting like a tour guide for Jay since I went to college there.  And because I generally like to act like a know-it-all.  Hopefully he’ll give me a good tip.

In one month from today, I will be ATTEMPTING to survive a FULL marathon somewhere in California Nevada, in that small city called Las Vegas.  Heard of it?  I’m so scared I’m piddling in my panties as we read and type or whatever…

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While I’m doing whatever it is I do, check out this blog:

alittlebitofus

Not only does misery love company, but apparently so does Piriformis!  Three cheers for Piriformis syndrome!  Yeah!

 

November 5, 2009

I’m so executive

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WORKOUT – Elliptical~30 mins + core workout on ball

Today’s the last day to enter my CONTEST.  I’m picking a winner tomorrow before I leave for Santa Barbara.  I think I’m going to have to have some runner ups because there’s a lot of good entries.

Husbo doiburger had to go to an actual office today and pretend like he has a job and knows what he’s doing.

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While he does that, I’m going to my magical pepto bismal pink office and pretending I have a job too.

Today’s job included executuve decision making=deciding which mag to read at the gym:

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OR

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I went with Runner’s World because pregnant people gross me out (well, not Nadya, everyone but her).  Especially pregnant people who’ve had sex with Hugh Hefner.

The next part of today’s job included quality control=making sure my Starbucks misto was in the proper holiday cup.

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And the last part of my extremely busy and professional day will include decorating the house for Christmas!!  Yes it may be early, but my life motto is to follow Starbucks to the death so when they celebrate Christmas, so does SkinnyRunner.

I leave you with a quote from Victoria Beckham who puts the A, E, I, O and C in anorexic I in thin.

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“I didn’t want to rely on retouching. I wanted to look at those pictures in 20 years’ time and say, ‘Wow, look – after three kids – I didn’t look bad.’” — on working out seven days a week to stay in shape

 

November 4, 2009

Reader questions and hair do

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[9] Comments 

My new color:

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I had lowlights done this time which I normally don’t and it’s a little dark for me.  Hopefully it fades out soon.  Nothing says “smart, funny, amazingly fast and SLENDER runner” like a bleached out blonde.

I’m doing the Audrina Partridge ceiling eyes here because for some reason, I thought it would help you see the hair better.  What?

Amy asked what kind of dog Elmer is…

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He is a German short hair, a big time hunting dog.  He’s known as “Scrappy Coco” in this household due to his magnificient highlighted bangs.  Ever seen Don’t Mess With the Zohan?

Maya asked how I hydrate on long runs…

I have this hydro belt:

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Hubby bought it for me online, it’s about $25 I think.  It takes getting used to because it feels like you got some major junk in your trunk (and back), but it’s not that bad.  It works fine for me, and I feel like JLO with it on. 

I’ve never ran a race with it and am still undecided whether to use it running Vegas next month.  I only wear it on about 15 milers or longer.  Shorter than that, I try to fuel up on breakfast margaritas and mimosas to get me through.

Marathon racers, do you wear hydro belts during the actual race??

And last question: tons and tons of people ask if I can be a surrogate mother to their future child because I’m so blindingly gorgeous and witty…

The answer is of course, yes!  But only 8 at a time, please.

 

November 4, 2009

Things that are GROSS

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1. Joe Simpson’s relationship with his daughter’s boobies.

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2. Butt pimples.

3. The 7 shades of yellow that make up Lindsey’s hair color.

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4. Back wash.  In a communal cup.  And you get the last sip.

5. Nadya Suleman.

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6. Paying CA state taxes for Suleman’s small country of children, which rivals the population of North Dakota.

7. Jon Gosselin’s parenting style.

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8. Milk in the fridge that more resembles cottage cheese.

9. Heidi Montag’s outfits from StripperMart.

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10. My roots.

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Going to bible study to pray over them, then the salon to terminate them.

 

November 3, 2009

Color of the day: Hunter’s Orange (PICS)

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[20] Comments 

WORKOUT – Ran in Huntington Beach 22.6 miles/3 hrs 11 mins

I went back to HB to run on the beach path and avenge my last horrible race there.  I’d link you to the race recap but I don’t anyone reading it again.  Think diaherra.

This run was as flat as Kate Hudson’ chest and even more pretty than her mugging down with A-Rod.  The entire 22 miles was along the beach; I saw a gazillion hundred surfers.  I ran out on the pier and saw a bajillion people fishing.  probably for surfers.  I resisted the urge to show them all how it’s done and kept running.

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Let’s get to the North Dakota pictures; they’re super random. like my life.

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At the airport headed to the great but lowly populated state of ND.

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Our sweet hotel room…  wondering where I can get a bedspread like this or at the very least, mauve carpet.

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Elmer, the hunting dog extraordinaire. 

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My brother Byron and his wife Niki who’s pregnant in my parent’s motorhome.  Someone needs to do some housekeeping it would appear.  Those cobwebs are outta control.

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Marni, the lapdog extraordinaire.

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Jason rubbing it in that he shot a pheasant and all I shot was the sky.

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“Hunter’s orange” could probably legally blind you it’s so bright.  But I suppose that’s the point, so no one mistakes you for an animal and shoots you.  I’d call it more “Carrot Top” orange, but then that would make people want to shoot at you, right?!

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I’m a mega loser.  Out of all those birds, I didn’t shoot a single one.  My aim is worse than Shaq at the free throw line.  We could have burglars in our house and I’d come barreling down the stairs with a shotgun and they wouldn’t even look up; they’d just keep grabbing stuff.  no threat at all…

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As a consolation prize, husband bought me my favorite food in the world-cinnamon bears and spice drops.  He does love me, I guess.

He loves me so much he said this was his absolute favorite, ravishingly beautiful picture of me:

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Wait a minute… that’s not a compliment is it?

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My 2 1/2 yr old nephew Kelton out for a power walk.

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Speaking of Kelton, look what he was for Halloween: a hunter’s orange Nemo.  He doesn’t want to get shot at while trick-or-treating.

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Awh, what a cute orange family.  They even match the sunset.

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And because I didn’t want to be left out, I went with the Hunter’s Orange Candy Corn Costume, North Dakota Version.  I wore leggings, boots, and a long sleeve shirt underneath, partly because it was cold and partly because you would end up with child if you didn’t.

(side note: I’ve stared at this picture for 4 hours and still can’t figure out what I’m doing in it.)

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Jaybobby went as a middle aged, greying, computer salesman with an incredibly emasculating dog.  I think he really nailed it this year.

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Ok I didn’t shoot these birds either.  I did hit one, but he just laughed at me, gave me the bird and flew off.

And that’s the conclusion of the 2009 pheasant hunting trip to North Dakota.  On with 85 degree November weather here in Orange County, CA.

 

November 3, 2009

Phoenix Pics

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[4] Comments 

I’m back in SoCal from North Dakota!!  I have lots of hunting pictures but realized I couldn’t show those without first getting rid of these couple Phoenix pics. The computer ate most of them but here’s the scraps.  I went to Phoenix a couple weeks ago to visit my parents who were there.

Enter my CONTEST: a 6 word response to WHY DO YOU RUN?  I’ll pick the winner on Friday since I’m running a race this weekend and you better believe I’m bringing my VIA coffee.

On with the show….

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A sunrise right in front of my parents’ house. It’s on a golf course and a couple mornings later I saw a coyote out on the green.  Yeah, I might have been scared, but no, I did not urinate my pants.

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My mom and I rode our sweet rides all over town, even a 7 mile trip to a breakfast diner.  Mom’s definitely getting a little risque showing the thigh there.

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My weapon of mass destruction – my dad’s bike.  My parents went to Walmart and bought cheapo $70 bikes.  Although the seat felt like a cinder block, it was actually fun to ride around. I hadn’t ridden a bike in years and wanted some training wheels…. ’til my mom spanked me and made me put on my big girl pants.

The last time I Lance Armstrong’ed (yeah, it’s a verb now) was in Hawaii 2 years ago: we rode 28 miles down Mount Haleakala.  Who doesn’t go to Maui to ride down a volcanic mountain?! Check it out HERE.

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This is the gym at my parents’ housing complex.  I took this picture because I was the only person under 55 in the entire place.  It’s a 55+ community so it makes sense, but it’s a litte weird seeing all these old peeps working it out… harder than I was.

That’s all my pics because the rest got lost in the great computer reset of 2009.  Similar to Y2K but with much more deadly repercussions.

I’m off to run, haven’t in a week. So while I’m doing that, check out this blog:

eatmovelive 

 

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